Oscars #2

The Piano - This one did not win the Academy Aware for Best Picture, but Holly Hunter and Anna Paquin (9 years old) did win best actress and best supporting actress, respectively. When I first started watching, I thought I was going to be bored the entire time because it does start off a little slow, but there was something unspoken that held my attention. And then once Harvey Keitel’s character really emerged, I was hooked. His character is so…dynamic – strong and gentle and brave and timid all at the same time. I want to use the word “erotic” to describe him, but not in a dirty way, if that makes sense. Holly Hunter definitely earned her Oscar – did a phenomenal job. I am officially addicted to actresses who are able to express intense emotion without using words. Wow. That one scene where her husband ……– wow! She was a mute during the entire film, so all she had was facial expressions and such. She nailed it. And she actually played all of the piano scores in the film, so kudos to her. Anna Paquin was at some points genius and other points right down annoying – you wanted to strangle her sometimes, but that was more her character than her I guess. For being so young at the time, she did a great job.

Gone With the Wind - BLEGH BLEGH BLEGH!! I can respect the film for its epic representation of the South amidst the Civil War – the destruction it left in its aftermath and the struggling to survive afterwards. But Scarlett O’Hara….I WANTED TO SLAP HER! “Oh Ashley, Oh Ashley” Shut up already you stupid bore! Ugh. HORRIBLE love story. Absolutely zero chemistry between ANY of the characters. And the child? REALLY? Ugh! Hated this film.

The Sound of Music - I really had no idea what the film was about and even after reading the synopsis, I didn’t think I was going to like it. Plus, all of those annoying songs that I had heard throughout my life that I knew were associated with this film, I really didn’t think I would like it at all. That being said, OMG I LOVED it! I loved everything about it. The singing was awesome (although I still find the songs a bit annoying), the characters were all endearing in one way or another, and I even found myself laughing out loud several times. Maria was sassy and comical and headstrong and adorable. And I don’t think the movie was all that predictable (I mean the love story was, but the overarching political story wasn’t). I walked away really enjoying the unique story it brought to the table.

Citizen Kane - This is another film that did not win the Oscar for Best Picture, but it sits at #1 on AFI’s Best 100 films so I wanted to watch it. I watched it a few weeks back and to tell you the truth, I still don’t know what I think about it. It was good, but not amazing….unique, but not mind-blowing. I don’t know if it is so highly revered because it broke into some new genre at the time? “Rosebud” was kinda intriguing, but I had a feeling halfway through the film that I knew what it referred to (and I was right). So I still don’t know if I like it or not. I am not passionate one way or the other.

Lawrence of Arabis - BORING. Not even going to waste time writing a review. BORING. Nothing exciting or compelling whatsoever. And to add insult to injury, it beat out To Kill A Mockingbird for best picture??? Really????

Oh! Let me add Les Miserables. Not the film. I watched the Broadway production a few weeks ago, and given that it qualifies as performing art too, here are my thoughts. :) ....it was long....and sad....and sometimes difficult to follow. I was somewhat familiar with the story, but found that I still had to read the synopses of each act to kinda know what was going on. The production spans many years in Valjean's life, so it tends to leap across decades without warning. The music was beautiful, but overall it was kinda too somber for me. I think I realized after watching it that I tend to love sad/somber movies, but when it comes to musicals, I prefer to laugh and be entertained.

Oscar Update

I mentioned in a previous post about how I intended to watch all of the Academy Award Best Picture winning movies. Now that I have marked a few off of the list, I thought I’d offer a few of my thoughts.

I try to average at least one film a week. When I started this project, I had already seen a few of the films, so I won’t comment on those at this point.

But in regards to the recent ones I’ve seen, my favorite thus far is Casablanca. I know, everyone says that – atleast anyone who has actually seen the movie – and I think that is because it really is that good. I can’t believe I had never seen it before. Brilliant acting. Great story. I loved how the characters weren’t so obvious. They didn’t verbally explain every single emotion they were feeling, which ultimately allowed the film to maintain this sort of mystery…but not the same kind of mystery that current films produce with their surprise twists or unexpected endings – this was more a sense of mystery in the motives and thoughts of the characters. It was really beautiful. I am not one to ever want to watch a movie more than once…but this one, yes definitely!

Let me follow that up with my least favorite so far: Hurt Locker. Not really all that impressed. I didn’t think the story was all that unique and none of the characters were all that endearing. What I mean by that is I didn’t care if they lived or died. I understand the film’s pertinence to the world we live in, and how it portrayed the type of warfare our military encounters today, but compared to other great war films, I just didn’t think it measured up.

No Country For Old Men – OMG! Wow! I had only ever seen Javier Bardem as the sweet, adorable Felipe in Eat, Pray, Love (which is weird since he played this role first). But yeah, not so sweet and adorable in this movie! He is CRAZY and I am now officially scared to death of him! Ha! His character actually reminded me of something Stephen King would have written into The Stand. In fact, if they ever redo The Stand as a movie, he should definitely play Randall Flagg. Brilliant portrayal of a madman. The other thing I liked about this film was that I sorta felt like I knew where the plot was going, but then it didn’t go there AT ALL (from what I hear, that is typical of the Coen brothers). But loved this one. Dark and violent and disturbing, but great film.

Kramer vs Kramer – Not too bad. Since this is a late 70’s film, I assume the whole divorce/child custody thing was a new issue to address in film. But what most impressed me about this film though, was not the story, but the acting. It reminded me of how much I love Meryl Streep. I first noticed her amazing acting skill in Sophie’s Choice and have since been amazed by her ability to communicate emotion without saying a word. Especially in roles where she experiences some sort of gut-wrenching heartache – you can see that pain etched on her face….it’s even in her eyes…it’s amazing….but she doesn’t come off as fake and trying too hard – she is just THAT good at acting. She and Kate Winslet are similar in that regard I think. I respect them both.

King’s Speech – I think given the material of the film, it was very well done. Most of the time, I have to be in the mood for period films or I don’t enjoy them…and this one was no different. So I kinda felt uninvested while watching it, but I was still able to appreciate it. Wasn’t the worst or the best. Just kinda in the middle. It has its merits.

Driving Miss Daisy. I liked this one. A lot. It kinda flowed like a stage play, and the acting was very similar to something you would expect from a play. It kinda reminded my of Steel Magnolias for some reason – not sure why since the storylines are absolutely nothing alike. But anyway, I enjoyed the evolution of the characters. Hoke was so endearing and charming and Miss Daisy, although stubborn and set in her ways, still had such a tender heart. It was a beautiful picture of how love, respect and friendship can bridge both racial and economic barriers. The final scene was so endearing – not overdone and cheesy. And Tommy always does a great Hoke impression when I ask him to do something around the house: “Yes’m, Miss Daisy. Hoke’ll get right on dat.” :)

The English Patient – This movie was way longer than I thought it was going to be. I had the opposite reaction with this one as I did with Javier in NCFOM because I have always associated Ralph Fiennes with madman characters. The first movie I remember seeing him in was Red Dragon and he was so creepy, that it kinda stuck. I couldn’t see him as anything else. Of course, that is why he made the perfect Voldemort, but I could never see him in a romantic role. Like that chickflik he played in with Jennifer Lopez a few years ago where she was the maid and he was the rich dude – I couldn’t relate because in my mind he was too creepy to be romantic. But this was the first film where I kinda saw him as sexy. I didn’t overall think the film or the acting was that phenomenal though. I have discovered recently that I get tired of films that glamorize infidelity. But I was able to see Ralph Fiennes in a new light, so I guess that accomplished something.

That's all for now. Next up in the queue is Gone With the Wind, Lawrence of Arabia, and maybe some of the musicals: Sound of Music, My Fair Lady, West Side Story....we'll see. I like to mix it up.

my mantra

Every morning when I begin my day, I repeat this mantra to myself: “I am a writer. I am good at this.” Over and over again.

Don’t laugh.

Being a writer is a lonely career and you rarely, if ever, have much encouragement. So I find any way I can to fight off the disheartening moments…and the seasons of just being bored to death with hearing my own voice (Yes, it happens.)

It is mentally exhausting to wrestle with words and ideas…and try to force them to line up in an orderly fashion on paper. They rebel more often than not.

And I often wonder if anyone will give a shit about anything I have to say anyway.

So yes, I have to remind myself every morning that I am good at this….that it is worth all of the headache and heartache….and that I wouldn’t be happy doing anything else….

But it’s a difficult job. It really, really is. And sometimes the only motivation I find is telling myself, “Suck it up. You can do this.”

So that’s what I do :)

Seriously?

Yesterday I spent four hours in the ER. Ugh.

While at work on Saturday night, I started to have chest pains – which isn’t in and of itself anything new as I experience them periodically. But they typically pop up and disappear within a few minutes and I don’t give it much thought. But Saturday night, they were not going away….and they were soon accompanied by shortness of breath, pressure in my chest, and fatigue….it kinda freaked me out. And living with a heart condition already, I try not to mess around with such things.

So my managers were kind enough to let me go home early. I debated going straight to the ER at that point, but didn’t want to freak Tom out more than he already was. So I assured him I would be fine and decided to sleep it off. When I woke up Sunday morning, the stabbing pains were mostly gone, but the pressure and shortness of breath were still aggravating me, although granted to a lesser degree.

Since this sort of pain has never lasted 12 hours before, it was still enough to worry me (and Tom) so we went to the ER…which kinda made me feel stupid because by the time we got down there, the pain had subsided even more and I was just really, really tired. But they did a few tests and everything came back normal. As to what caused this episode, who knows. Stress? Overexertion? Anxiety? The tests ruled out the major stuff like heart attack and aortic dissection, so that’s good.

Today I still feel a little residual pressure in my chest…..but I’m guessing that is more from the stress and anxiety in the aftermath - of thinking I might need to change something in this chaos I call my life in order to protect my health…..i.e., I work two jobs because we need the money. But the two jobs tend to wear me out physically…and mentally….but I can’t quit my second job because we need the money….and I already feel like I am not contributing enough. And I don’t want to burden Tom with that kind of stress……

The unanswerable question: is all of this work-work-work and go-go-go causing permanent damage to my heart?

Argh.

In other news, being married ushers in an entirely new dynamic to how I make life decisions. Nothing is just about me anymore. It’s kinda weird to navigate through and embrace that.

My Favorite Things

During the wedding planning process, Tom and I threw around the idea of sharing a few of our favorite things about one another during the ceremony.

Wait...OK....the truth is I threw around the idea and he said "Hell No." So we compromised and didn't do it at all :)

But I still jotted down a few of mine...and since this is MY blog...and MY rules....

Here they are!

A Few of My Favorite Things About Tom

*How he looks at me

*He talks A LOT!

*He shares my odd and nerdy love for the ancient world

*When we hug, his hands automatically migrate to my ass

*That I am learning to be a little bit less selfish by being around him (something my mother enthusiastically applauds)

*He allows me to be the strong-willed woman that I am, and can still tell me “No”

*He is actually smarter than me

*How polite and thoughtful he is

*His shoulders and that bald head!

*He is never ashamed of who he is or what he loves

*He “gets” me

And The Winner Is...

We recently returned from a week in LA. While I was there, I decided that I wanted to watch all of the Academy Award Best Picture films.....from the very beginning....eighty-three years worth.

It will make me more well-rounded, yes?

Or maybe it will just be a HUGE waste of time.

But I'm gonna attempt it nonetheless because once I realized that I had only seen a small percentage of these critically acclaimed films...and I do typically enjoy critically-acclaimed films...I figured what the hell.

Glancing over the list of winners, there are quite a few movies I've never even heard of.....and a lot of musicals???? Oh well, I'm game.

Ohhh, but I have seen quite a few of the films that won Best Actor or Actress...and quite a few films that were nominated for different awards, so that makes me feel better. :) But still, now I have a never-ending list of movie options!

Anyone want to join me? We can make it a standard Sunday afternoon thing.

The Aftermath

In the months leading up to our wedding day, several different people told me that I would wake up the morning after my wedding and think, “We should’ve just eloped.” That when all was said and done, all of the planning and expenses and stress would seem not worth the trouble.

And I grant you, there were times during the planning process that I thought they might be right. At several points along the way, eloping seemed to be an easy escape from the madness. After all, 18 months is a LOOONNNGGGG time to spend planning a wedding. I wouldn’t advise it for anyone…especially anyone who is less neurotic than yours truly. ;)

But the morning after, I had the opposite reaction. I felt blessed beyond measure and thought that our day was worth every single penny and every single stressed-out moment of GETTING TO our big day.

Because our day was absolutely perfect.

Every. Single. Moment.

It was everything I hoped it would be.

Everything went according to plan. The venue was gorgeous. I had butterflies a few times during the day…and a handful of tearful moments….but not an ounce of stress. Thank God!

I didn’t even get tired of smiling. And from what I hear, I was smiling a lot!

And have you seen the pictures!??? Wowza!

But I do have one regret….

With all of the running around after the ceremony and trying to make sure I said hello to everyone…I failed to get photos WITH anyone. My college friends…my Jack….people I love dearly who I haven’t seen in years…..my family….even my close friends here in the city – I didn’t get photos with anyone. And that makes me sad because seeing all of you was my favorite part of the day.

So to all of you – I am SO glad you were there to celebrate with us. Thank you for coming from near and far to help make our day one of the most beautiful moments of our lives. I love you!