Yesterday I spent four hours in the ER. Ugh.
While at work on Saturday night, I started to have chest pains – which isn’t in and of itself anything new as I experience them periodically. But they typically pop up and disappear within a few minutes and I don’t give it much thought. But Saturday night, they were not going away….and they were soon accompanied by shortness of breath, pressure in my chest, and fatigue….it kinda freaked me out. And living with a heart condition already, I try not to mess around with such things.
So my managers were kind enough to let me go home early. I debated going straight to the ER at that point, but didn’t want to freak Tom out more than he already was. So I assured him I would be fine and decided to sleep it off. When I woke up Sunday morning, the stabbing pains were mostly gone, but the pressure and shortness of breath were still aggravating me, although granted to a lesser degree.
Since this sort of pain has never lasted 12 hours before, it was still enough to worry me (and Tom) so we went to the ER…which kinda made me feel stupid because by the time we got down there, the pain had subsided even more and I was just really, really tired. But they did a few tests and everything came back normal. As to what caused this episode, who knows. Stress? Overexertion? Anxiety? The tests ruled out the major stuff like heart attack and aortic dissection, so that’s good.
Today I still feel a little residual pressure in my chest…..but I’m guessing that is more from the stress and anxiety in the aftermath - of thinking I might need to change something in this chaos I call my life in order to protect my health…..i.e., I work two jobs because we need the money. But the two jobs tend to wear me out physically…and mentally….but I can’t quit my second job because we need the money….and I already feel like I am not contributing enough. And I don’t want to burden Tom with that kind of stress……
The unanswerable question: is all of this work-work-work and go-go-go causing permanent damage to my heart?
Argh.
In other news, being married ushers in an entirely new dynamic to how I make life decisions. Nothing is just about me anymore. It’s kinda weird to navigate through and embrace that.
2 comments:
I went through something similar a few years ago. My heart would just begin to race and pound really hard for no reason. After EEGs and wearing a heart monitor and other tests, it was determined that there was nothing physical wrong -- so they said it was elevated stress and panic attacks. Um, okay. I worked on getting my blood pressure down and reducing my cholesterol intake, even though neither was very high. It still happens once in a while, but not often. Hope yours is just stress or something minor and controllable.
quit the second job and enjoy your life while you still have it!
Post a Comment